March Madness is very fitting for my life right now

My journey in recovery has not been all fun and games. Getting sober from drugs is hard, period. I’ve learned a lot. Sometimes through meetings, people, and books other times the hard way. I’ve gotten into a relationship which was warned against me but I think I finally found the right person. It has been a roller coaster these past few months learning how to trust, grow, and love one another.

I’ve taken some time to get some professional help and have enlisted some great people at Florida Recovery Center. Right now I’m in a halfway house in Delray Beach, which has really enabled me to focus on what is important: staying sober. Some might say that it is the weak thing to do or it is going “backwards” by asking for help at a treatment center when you are already sober, but times are tough.

Not only have I struggled with addiction but I’ve struggled with depression as well, and now am realizing I also have very bad anxiety that I never noticed due to self medication. I’ve thought about just using marijuana, but that never works. This blog does help a lot, but I can only write so much. Thanks for reading.

Addiction Is A Mental Illness But Does It Make Me A Psychopath?

Understanding Mental Illness

A mental illness is also referred to as having a mental disease and at times can become so severe that the person diagnosed with this illness may be referred to as a psychopath. As soon as the word psychopath is heard it is usually used in reference to having antisocial characteristics. Yet I believe this classification is a bit skewed. However when I hear the word psychopath I do not envision a person with unsociable traits.

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Understanding Drug Addictions: Childhood Stories

Getting SoberI have lived most of my life through curious eyes. As a child, I had a strange desire for anything that was new to me. I would desire every new toy, new candy, I even remember one time I pleaded for an entire month to have a pair of shoes with light up soles. I feel as if I am making myself sound like a spoiled child but it is quite the contrary.

Just because I said I desired owning the newest gadget does not mean that I actually got them. The truth is that as a child my family was not the most fortunate with money. This was a fact that I did not learn until quite sometime after my childhood. Read More About “Understanding Drug Addictions: Childhood Stories” »

I Want to Get Sober Again

i want to get soberWhat is the difference between social drinking and abusing alcohol? For some this creates a grey area between the lines of alcoholism and social drinking, that results in reflective questioning. Such as; when am I crossing the line, where are the signs that warn me, and how will I know when I have gone too far?

These questions are reflective and will most certainly arise when approaching the grey lines between social drinking and alcoholism.  For me I have been struggling with addiction as it has created a great deal of problems in my social life. I personally want to get sober again and stay away from these grey areas.

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Helping an Addict Recover

I'm Getting Sober Again | The Addictive Blog | Helping Addicts Recover

I plan on getting sober by living my rowdy life one breath at a time. One long deep breath at a time really is the only way I know how to start my day off. I usually wake up around 7:30 A.M. and start with a deep breath to take the morning edge off. Then I eat some cereal with orange juice as I check the news to see what insanity might have occurred while I slept. As the time rounds 8:30 A.M., I get dressed for my days activities; a suit for work, a pair of mesh shorts for the gym, or nothing if it is my day off. Now replenished and hopefully dressed I am ready to take on the world as I take one last deep breath on my way out of my front door for my morning run. Read More About “Helping an Addict Recover” »

Her Touch Lingers

The sunset that represents Mary and I's first kiss.
The sunset that represents Mary and I’s first kiss.

I am humbled by my addictions; I am accustomed to her voice, to her scent, and to her lingering touch. I meet her back when I was thirteen just outside of my middle school. She was a friend of my buddies and they decided to introduce us. She noticed my leg shake as she approached me and before I could speak we were looking into one another’s eyes. We locked eyes for about five minutes before she finally spoke to me.

She told me her name was Mary and I responded with “you’re beautiful, how about you call me tonight.”

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Being the Addict

Being the addict is so strange; food, friends, family, living, breathing all seem better depending whether I am high or not. I was not always thinking about stuffing every corner of my body with drugs. Once upon a time I used to get high on life and live it to the max. Rather then worrying about my next high I was worried about when I would get to go out and play again. I was taught to always try my best and do what is right my whole life. At least that’s what I like telling myself everyday to be satisfied the craving of my addictions. Despite the fact that I am now a sober man today, I’ll never escape my reality that I am still an addict. Read More About “Being the Addict” »